Definitely not...

I definitely did not feel tempted to turn the hose on when Jackson was chewing on the end while playing in the kiddie pool. I am a responsible, loving mother who would never give in to temptation just for a good laugh.

I definitely did not ignore my crying children so I could check Facebook. I always jump up at the first sound they make to get them up from their naps.

I definitely did not pick up an already-been-through-the-digestive-system raisin off the floor. My son's waste always stays in the diaper and I always change him immediately after he goes.

I definitely did not get up to feed my daughter at 2 am and then get sucked into a Rolling Stones special on PBS. I always put my daughter back to bed immediately so she does not get used to being up in the middle of the night. I never just sit there holding her, watching her sleep.

I definitely did not boycott mopping my kitchen floor until my new steam mop gets here. I always mop and sanitize my floor daily. See "raisin" above.

I definitely did not feed Jackson the rest of Molly's cereal when he was throwing a fit yesterday. I thoroughly believe in teaching my children that throwing fits does not get them their own way.

I definitely did not hug my children enough this week... that I definitely did not do.